Two Thumbs Up

Or, in my dad's case, one big toe & one thumb up..... ;) JK, Dad!

You should probably all rent this movie... Martian Child. It is great. It might make you cry, but it will probably make you laugh your ass off too.... how great is that!

~~~Ch Ch Ch Check it out~~~

Sometimes I am Special, as in Ed.

So this past weekend, I went on a crazy cleaning spree. Not necessarily because my apartment needed to be cleaned, because frankly it always is... but mainly because I felt like I needed to be productive... but I didn't want to get ready and actual go somewhere.

Anyway.... during the spree I decided to wash my bathroom rug and shower curtain and replace the vinyl liner that I currently had on my shower. So, after I washed the shower curtain (the decorative outer one), naturally I put it in the dryer..... Dumb move. It totally shrunk. Of course. So, now I have a gimpy shower curtain.

Hookin' for Charity

So, tonight, yours truly will be auctioned off for a date at a Cystic Fibrosis event. I have limited details (Which I hate. I am a planner, people!) about this event, other than 9 guys and 4 girls will have to go on a date with the highest bidders!

Generally speaking, I don’t mind putting myself out there… and for those of you that really know me; I am not one to shy away from attention. But, for some reason, doing this scares me to death. I can just see it now….

“And our next Single up for bid… Ms. Charlie Duncan… bidding starts at $ 5.00.”

“…”

“Um... Ok. Anyone?”

“$2.50 Ladies and Gentlemen… it is for the kids….”

“…”

(Crickets chirping in the background)

That would piss me right the hell off.

Felony Melanie

Yesterday I got my oil changed, filled my gas tank up, and washed my car. I dislike doing all of those things... because I feel that my money should be spent on more important things. Such as, shoes, new clothes, hair products, lip gloss, etc. But, I going home last night I felt like a mature, responsible adult. "Look at me, I just maintained my vehicle!", I wanted to say to my neighbor!

Anyway... I think it is funny that I went home with such a sense of accomplishment considering that I deliberately broke the law during my errands. Let me explain, the mitigating circumstances... I get my oil changed at Walmart, because I am smart with my money and don't mind hobknobbing with other "spend thrifts" if you will. So, when I went to pick up my vehicle, I got a few things. I ended up picking up more items than I anticipated though and didn't want to have to walk all the way to the front of the store for a cart or basket, so I stopped in the cleaning aisle and picked up a bucket. So, as I lobbed groceries into my bucket like it was on little couture shopping bag, I grabbed a banana for dinner.

Well, I went to pay and the man said that I couldn't get the banana because they didn't have a scale... (At least that is what I think he said, because he was talking like he had a mouth full of shit.....) So, I did what anyone would do, threw the banana into a bag with the rest of the groceries. Any one would do that right?!?!?! I have to admit, when my mom asked how I would like going to jail over a banana... It did put things into perspective just a bit.

Karma: That Bitch!

My parents are going to love this…..

In celebration of the fact that it made it above the freezing mark this past weekend, I decided to rock some cute new open toed shoes.

Unfortunately, I had been observing the “they are covered, just ignore them” mentality and I happened to need a pedicure. To save some cash (I am budgeting for my Vegas trip in 9 days!!!) I decided to just give my self a quick polish change on my own.

So there I sat in my living room, catching up on celebrity news and painting my toes… being a total girl. You wouldn’t have known it was a girl though when you heard the expletives fly out of my mouth when I dumped acetone all over my end table (it is really the center, main table, but I think they might all be called “end tables”… ??).

Of course acetone just eats away at the stain on the table instantly. I was sooooo pissed.

The problem was, who was I going to be mad at, I freaking did it. Then I thought of my poor parents. You see, about 15 years or so ago I did the same thing with acetone to our big nice (probably new) dining room table!

I wanted to kick my own ass when I did it to my little $99 Target table, it is truly surprising that I survived that incident with my parents!!!!

Word of the Day

I am a total nerd sometimes. You should know that.

I reference Merriam-Webster Dictionary several times a day and even get the Word of the Day sent to me. I try to use each word at least once throughout the course of the day… most of the time I don’t though. Just to keep it real.

I would like to share today’s word (which is actually a phrase, sometimes they do that) with you.

Gild the Lily
GILD-thuh-LILL-ee

*I love that they had to put thuh*

Meaning: to add unnecessary ornamentation to something beautiful in its own right

How great is that, I love it!!!! What a beautiful word/phrase of the day!!!

**Please reference the first line… Simple pleasures.**

Excuse Me Please

Dear Truck Driver:

I get it. You are pissed. I know the gas prices are high; I am not behind you on my bicycle, after all… What are you proving by driving slow and holding up traffic on the highway, though? I know Des Moines is a special place, but I can promise the President is not behind you and I am pretty sure that Joe Schmo on his way to work and Grandma Gus on her way to pick up some Metamucil don’t care to join in on this show of protest.

So, while I am more than happy to join a letter writing campaign or wear a button, you are going to have to move your ass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sincerely,

Charlie-Girl
(Who happens to be in a damn hurry.)